Counting the days and thinking happy thoughts

Someone asked if we get to keep Alexandra now that court has been completed. We wish! On January 9th the ten day waiting period ends and then the three of us say a quick and courteous farewell to the orphanage. It is a nice place and all....and I am grateful for the care that they have given our daughter up to this point. But we are ready to hit the road and take her home.

After our morning visit, we walked home from the orphanage. Usually it takes about 25 minutes but the extreme icy conditions made it about ten minutes longer. Some poor guy nearly wiped out, and as he slid by us Candace started laughing hysterically.

Today, I read the book that Candace brought with her. It wasn't bad and I think I enjoyed it more than she did. More importantly, it passed a few more hours. I know I said it before...and at the risk of sounding repetetively whiny, the afternoons can be extremely boring here. I have resorted to downloading crossword puzzles from the internet to work on while Candace naps. I just can't get into the daytime sleeping. I think there is a limit to how much sleep my body is willing to accept. Even when I stay up late (11:00 pm) I still end up having around 9 hours. So afternoon naps are not really necessary I guess. Later in the afternoon, I spent some time at the nearby mall wandering from store to store, caught in the flow of the last minute holdiay shoppers. It is tomorrow night that Father Frost visits the Russian-Ukrainian children to give them their presents.

The evening visit was pretty quiet. I think Alexandra got a bit played out near the end of it. For the last half hour, Candace and I alternated carrying her around as she lay her head on our shoulder and relaxed. We thought about how neat it will be when we are home and Alexandra will actually fall asleep while we are doing this...and we can carry her into her own bed for the rest of the night. After our visit, we spent some time with our American friends in the newly renovated lobby-bar at our hotel before heading to the grocery store to pick up supper.

On Saturday, January 13th we get back to Manitoba. We'll stay overnight at Candace's sisters in Winnipeg before making the short trek home the following day. With much of the process completed and everything else on hold until after the upcoming holiday week, we are just counting down the days until we get home. Two weeks from today we will be in Manitoba. That doesn't sound so long. One image that keeps us focused is a vision of a Sunday morning in the not-to-distant future. We already can see the three of us spending time cuddled together in our bed before getting up to make breakfast together. Then we'll slowly get dressed and pull a sled around the neighbourhood to visit friends. Once we make it back home, I'll tip toe around while Candace and Alexandra have their mid-day naps. After maybe 90 minutes or so, I'll make a series of small noises loud enough to wake the little one. Then we'll quietly head downstairs, father and daughter, to spend the rest of the afternoon doing something together. I won't be selfish though...I'll wake Candace in time for supper.

Hello from Mommy and Daddy David!

Well...it is official. Candace and I are legally the parents of Mila Alexandra David. We had court this morning and everything went very well and extremely quickly. At 9:10 am we entered the judges chambers. There were people there...the two of us, our translator, the judge, his stenographer, two jurors, a social worker, and the lawyer from the orphanage. Our judge was very personable and quickly made us feel relaxed. He asked us some quick questions, the social worker spoke for a minute and this was followed by the lawyer. We were then asked to leave the room while the judge and jurors deliberated. We were called back in five minutes later and the judge congratulated us and wished us happy new year. While the whole process did not take very long, we spent the rest of the day reflecting upon the significance of what had happened. From this day forward, Candace and I may be officially referred to as "mommy" and "daddy". Wow.

Given that court went so quickly, we did not have to skip our morning visit. We headed down to the orphanage and told Alexandra the good news...although I am not sure if she understood me. It doesn't matter, I am certain she could tell how happy and excited we were. We brought some clothes for her to try on and she did a fashion show for us. We discovered that we had a couple of pairs of pants and shoes that were too big, so we exchanged them later...and bought some more stuff for her. The evening visit brought more clothes and more modelling. I am thinking that she now may recognize our official designation as parents given something that happened on the way up to her room at the end of the evening. She had been calling Candace "momma" and me "papa" but she sings different things as I carry her to her room. Her favourite verses have been "malako, malako", "papa toli", and "mommy, mommy". Tonight was the breakthrough. Halfway up the stairs she started singing "daddy, daddy, daddy". While it was likely the simplest lyrics imaginable I can tell you I have never heard such a wonderful song in my entire life.

It is getting really busy with the holidays. Here on the eastern (Russian) side of the country, the biggest holiday is New Years. Today, the supermarket at our nearby mall was jammed with people. You would not believe the amount of vodka that we saw in some of the shopping carts. Already, we have noticed that the fireworks are increasing in frequency. Last night, we watched an amazing display in the sky that lasted about 12 minutes. I can't wait to see what they have for Sunday night.

A few people have asked us what our phone number is over here. We have a cell phone provided by the agency and our number is 011-38-066-447-6824. Remember, that the time here is eight hours ahead of Manitoba time. Right now it is about 9:30 pm here and it is only 1:30 pm back home. If you ever want to check what time it is in the Ukraine, click the link on the left side of this page.

Allright...Candace wants to check her email so I have to wrap up quickly. What were the other highlights...okay, I found a barber today and got a haircut. I was happy with the results and the cost was $3.80. On the way home our taxi driver did not slow down sufficiently rounding a corner and slid into a builiding. The others in the cab told us the same driver had backed into a couple of vehicles a few days earlier and drove off as if nothing happened. To his credit, it was really slippery outside. Walking home from supper with Candace and our American friends, I wiped out twice on the sidewalk. And did I mention that Candace and I are officially parents?

Everything happens for a reason

We slept until 8:00 am today...there were no dogs barking, no car alarms blaring, and no loud arguments in Russian outisde our door. I got up right away to construct a clothes line across our room for about 20 pair of underwear. Add the automatic washer and dryer as two other things I really miss from back home.

As I mentioned yesterday, our court date was postponed until tomorrow. Proving that everything happens for a reason, the delay allowed us to attend the Christmas concert at the orphanage. Alexandra wasn't really that into it, but it was still quite a treat. I videotaped it and then showed it to some parents who missed it. My Russian is not that great but here is what I think happened during the play. Santa Claus lost something so the kids danced around him and sang. Then Mrs. Claus came and the kids threw snowballs at Santa. Then Santa pulled a toy rabbit from a bag and it magically transformed into a lady in a rabbit suit when he went behind a tree. Then Alexandra's group of four did some kind of dance before five kids made individual declarations to Santa. It appeared that this was all it took to save Christmas. Everyone joined hands and danced around the tree. When the rest of the audience started clapping and standing, Candace and I assumed the concert was over and joined in the applause.

After the morning visit, we jumped into a cab and I said "Pizza" and the driver took us across town to the pizza parlour. I guess some words are universal. Following lunch, we decided to walk back to the hotel. It was a really nice day...above zero and everything was melting. We then met up with the American couple who had just finished court. They are now the proud parents of two boys - ages 4 and 2. Next we called a couple from Manitoba who also had court this morning. They now are the official mom and dad of two girls ages 9 and 7. Like us, they have the waiting period until January 9th before they can pick up the official decree.

Thanks again to everyone who has been making comments on this blog. We now check twice a day to see if there are any updates. While we are far away, every single comment makes us feel connected with home.

Court delays but the shower runs on time

Well...we were supposed to have court tomorrow but now it is postponed until Friday. I just called our facilitator to confirm the time for tomorrow morning and she said the adoption form is at the Adoption Agency in Kiev but it wasn't signed in time for tomorrow. I guess I am lucky I called her. She has assured us that it will be signed tomorrow and then delivered here for our court date on Friday. Here's hoping...because if it isn't we will hit the holiday that starts Saturday and we will be screwed. While we have been fortunate for the most part with the process this is the second time in the last little while a glitch in processing paper work has held us up. About a week and a half ago something wasn't signed or processed when it was supposed to be and we were set back a couple of days. Quite frustrating, but like so many things over here, totally out of our control. All we can do is put our trust in the people who are supposed to be helping us and hope that they deliver.

While this little development puts a small damper on the day, and our plans for tomorrow, we won't let it get us down. We had a nice time today visiting with Alexandra. She sat and watched about 20 minutes of videos of herself that we have recorded since we arrived. She was quite entertained. After lunch, Candace and I went shopping again and picked up some more clothes for Alexandra. We are going to have to buy a new suitcase if we get anything else over here. Its hard to resist some of the purchases because clothes are so cheap.

Oh yeah...when we got back from our evening visit, the lady who supervises /guards our floor came up and told us there had been a problem in our room. Apparently the shower kicked in during our absence and created a bit of a mess in the bathroom. The problem was a direct result of the unusual frequency by which our plumbing actually works. Usually, the water is turned off from about 10:00 am - 2:00 pm for some reason which I have yet to discover. Today it was still off when we departed at 4:40 pm and I thought the taps were turned off. I was wrong. The lady was very nice and she cleaned everything up for us.

Boxing Day

Well...Alexandra appears to be a tough little girl. She actually hit the floor a few times today and she simply gets up and continues on her way. We may have acutally left her with a bit of a shiner this evening. As I put her up on the window ledge for her nightly look outside, she turned into the metal handle and it caught her just below the eye. She did not even flinch although I felt like crying. My first experience with parental neglect. While I am glad she is resilient and doesn't seem to mind a few bangs and bruises, every time she is mildly in jeopardy I feel responsible. I'll have to be more careful tomorrow.

This morning we were having a wonderful time playing and laughing with Alexandra when one of the ladies came in and took her away for her Christmas concert practice. Despite speaking in Russian, the lady made it extremely clear that we were not to come and watch. Apparently, it was too disruptive when a few of us couples were there earlier this week. The concert is scheduled for Thursday morning at 10:00 am, the same time that we and the American couple have our court appearances. I am suspicious that the scheduling conflict was intentional.

After our morning visit, Candace and I went for lunch with the couple from Minnesota. We ended up hanging out for the afternoon and we hosted them in our spacious 70 square foot hotel room. It was nice to get to know them a bit more and learn about the story that led them to the Ukraine. They are really nice people and we have been very fortunate to befriend them. It was great to have an actual activity during the afternoon rather than reading and napping. It certainly made the day more enjoyable and made it pass quickly. We have already made a commitment for an arranged marriage in 20 years between her and their oldest boy, Anthony. Alexandra is now kissing him on command...the adults all enjoy when she does this but little Anthony doesn't seem too thrilled about it.

During the evening visit, both couples gave our kids electronic, noise-making toys. The most popular one for both kids were their new cellular telephones that made a bunch of neat sounds. Alexandra enjoyed hers for about 20 minutes until she broke the back of the casing. It is interesting, both Alexandra and Anthony have become notorious for damaging toys. I am quite certain that the other parents leave things in their bags until these two are out of sight. If she breaks anything when we visit with friends and neighbours back home, we promise to fix or replace any damaged items. It will be essentially the same arrangement that I have for when Candace spills things.

Merry Christmas

Well...I woke up this morning and resolved that I would not be down and out because it was Christmas and we were in eastern Europe. As soon as I got out of bed, I told Candace that no matter what happened I would remain positive and upbeat. Ironically enough, about ten minutes later I seemed to become instantly affected by the same gastrointenstinal condition that afflicted our American friend yesterday. Despite being "delayed" in starting off our day, and despite being forced to end our morning visit prematurely, I didn't lose sight of my oath that started the day. Things started to get better as soon as I lay back down on my bed. While waiting for the Immodium to kick in I received a phone call from my mother in Nova Scotia. As I chatted on the phone, Candace went to the store to stock up on bananas and other necessities.

Then in the early afternoon, I made a communication breakthrough that was somewhat of a Christmas miracle. After three days of trying to pay for Alexandra's return ticket by telephone with a German airline agent and by fax with the Russian desk people here at the hotel, we finally received her electronic ticket. With only two tickets up until today, I was worried that Alexandra and I would have to leave mommy in the Ukraine for a while. Once the ticket was secured and the Immodium working I actually had a nap. This time it was Candace who stayed awake all through the afternoon.

Our evening visit was great. Alexandra was full of life and her an another girl played some kind of keep-away game with a skipping rope for about 20 minutes. They were yelling and running and laughing and the adults were videotaping their romp through the play room. My only concern is the bananas, which I have mentioned a couple of times already. Today Candace gave her three of them. I wonder if there are any serious health risks related to over-consumption of bananas.

My brother Raymond commented yesterday that he discovered that the Russian

nickname for people with the name Alexandra or Alexander is "Sasha". Actually, most of the people at the orphanage call Alexandra by this nickname. We are trying to use her given name exclusively. On those occasions in which I have let "Sasha" slip I am met with a stern look from Mommy. Nothing against the name Sasha of course...especially given that our niece, and Raymond's daughter, has this name. We are actually imagining shortening the name to Alex once she gets used to Alexandra.

Tonight Candace and I will try to replicate Christmas at home. We are going upstairs and having chicken (no turkey available) and the trimmings (rice, potatoes, chocolate bars, and beer) before we start her family tradition of Christmas card playing until everyone falls asleep at the table. With only two of us, we can't play the game most popular at her parent's house, but we decided a few rounds of "hola" would be appropriate.

Merry Christmas everyone. Enjoy the giving and the receiving, the eating and drinking...but most of all, enjoy each other's company.

Christmas Eve away from home

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...is something that I haven't felt the urge to say lately. Kind of a bitter beginning I expect but I think both Candace and I are feeling rather homesick today. It's funny...because the last two Christmases we actually chose to take warm-weather vacations. Given that fact, it might therefore seem a tad hypocritical for us to lament being away again. The difference is quite clear to us however. Part of the reason we chose to travel the previous holidays was because each time we had expected to make the trip we are currently on. When the adoption plans had not worked out the way we had hoped we decided to take our minds off things with trips. This time we so desperately want to be home and we feel like we are kind of stuck in some far away place that Christmas forgot. Now I know the actual Christmas day over here is on January 7th...but for the last 37 years of my life December 25th was pretty significant. Even our last two years the places that we visited catered to North American tourists and we spent Christmas Eve toasting the holidays with other Canadians. Tonight, we enjoyed pork cutlets and potatoes listening to technopop and some selections from Cher and Madonna in the hotel restaurant. We had planned on toasting the holidays but when I asked our waiter to bring us two light beer he returned with another Greek salad for Candace. The other English speaking couple (from Minnesota) went straight home this evening because the wife is suffering from gastrointestinal distress cause by some unknown food product. Prior to their departure, we spent the last few minutes of our visit talking about what we missed the most about back home. That is probably why I am in such glum holiday spirits.

Despite our distant location and unusual circumstances, I do feel more fortunate this Christmas than ever before. While I would much rather be sitting at Candace's grandmother's house with her family than in this internet cafe, I know that our visit here has already reaped rewards. Christmas is about family...and you don't have to be actually with your entire family to appreciate them. So to all our family and friends...we are thinking about you and hope you all have a safe and happy holiday season. I am grateful that I am here with Candace and we both realize that we have already received the best present we could have ever imagined. So while Santa may not find us tonight, I know that at 9:00 am tomorrow morning we will see Alexandra again...and that beats opening any other gift that we could find under a tree. Again, to everyone back home, Merry Christmas. While we wish we could be with you we are really glad we are here.